I gotcher defense right here!

Future hall of famer, Jim Thome, long before hitting 600 big league homers.

Fish and I each clobbered each other around in games one and two, before we actually played a tight, competitive game in the series finale.

GAME ONE

Jered Weaver, recently traded from Mario, tossed a complete game shutout in his first game as a Mariner, while the ever-powerful offense tallied eight runs. Fish’s starter, Gio Gonzalez, was chased after just four innings, yielding five runs. Jose Bautista hit a homer and scored two runs. Ian Kinsler drove in two runs on three hits, while Luis Valbuena and Mike Napoli and Jason Bartlett each collected two hits apiece. Vlady Guerrero was a perfect 4 x 4 for Fish in the loss.

NICK 8, FISH 0

W – Weaver, L – Gonzalez

GAME TWO

Fish turned the tables in game two, destroying starter Jeremy “Dimples” Guthrie who lasted just three innings. Vlady hit a two-run homer in the first inning, before Fish added another five runs in the third thanks to a Justin Morneau three-run bomb and a J.D. Drew two-run round tripper. The birther Luke Scott, another new acquisition, hit a two-run homer for Nick in the loss. Trevor Cahill, Fish’s lone righty, pitched a solid game going 7 2/3 innings, surrendering just three runs and five hits.

FISH 8, NICK 3

W – Cahill, L – Woody Guthrie

GAME THREE

Future hall of famer Jim Thome hit a three-run bombski in the top of the eighth, against – get this - a lefty, to secure a series win for the Mariners. Luis Valbuena, of all people, hit a solo homer in the first for Nick, before Fish tied things in the bottom of the inning on a Morneau single that scored Alex Rios. “Cranky pants” Shawn Marcum exited the game after just 3 and 1/3 innings and his arm problems look to be semi-serious (out 15 games). Fish got right after reliever Darren O’Day taking the lead in the fourth on a David DeJesus RBI single. Nalco’s employee of the year held the lead until Thome’s moonshot in the eighth. Vlady, finished off his excellent series with a solo homer in the bottom of 8, but Nick’s closer Neftali Feliz shut the door, earning a win in 1 and 2/3 innings of work.

Though he’s known as one of the better in-game managers in PTP history, Fish’s strategy in the bottom of the ninth still has fans talking. His first two hitters reached base before Cervelli sac bunted the runners to second and third. With one out Ramon Santiago attempted to suicide squeeze in Rajai Davis (the pinch runner) from third only to strikeout. Davis was then tagged at the plate and the game ended. Great drama; great series.

NICK 4, FISH 3

W – Feliz, L – Thornton

Nick wins series in two of three games.

Defense matters - Nick @ Torto

Another series update comin' atcha!  This one is from the spacious confines of Comerica Park, where Nick and I played the 2nd of our 2 AL series.  Nick was nearly swept in the first meeting, were it not for the walk-off 3-R HR from one Brennan "The Big Puppy" Boesch.  This time it was Boesch who had hand in ensuring Nick got swept.

Brennan Boesch - about to drop the ball and cost Nick 2-runs, but only before a Mike Napoli error cost him 1

Game 1 - Zack Greinke @ Doug Fister (I hardly know her):
The Tigers jumped out early in this one, getting a Boring Barton solo shot in the bottom of the 1st, followed by 2 more in the 2nd, on a 2-out single from Juan Pierre, making it 3-0 Torto. Nick's batters spent much of the first 5 innings with the bat on their shoulders, earning only 1 hit (a Bautista double), but 5 walks.  None of the uncharacteristic walky-ness of Fister cost him any runs however.  The Tigers got one more in the 4th, on a solo HR from the newly acquired B.J.Upton.  Nick got off the schnide in the 6th, on a Pronk Hafner sac fly.  Nothing doing after that, as lefty long specialist Brian Duensing came in for the final 2 and 2/3rds, and closed it out for an old school save.  It was not without some drama though, as Nick got solo jobbers from Brett Gardner and a pinch-hitting Mike Napoli in the 9th, before Shin Soo-Choo made the final out.  Nick's defense full of low error ratings and 'C' and 'D' ranges seemed to hold up for him in this one, but it wouldn't last.
Torto wins 4-3

Game 2 - Ricky Romero @ Gavin Floyd:
Nick started of with some solid offense, getting 2 runs in the 1st on a Gardner lead-off single, a Bautista walk, and a 2-RBI double by the Korean Delight, Shin Soo-Choo.  However, Nick's lone lefty starter got battered around early in this one, and was chase him after 1.1 IP.  Defense didn't help him early either, as 2-out errors by Romero and Wilson Betemit extended the 1st inning and allowed 3 more runs across homeplate.  The 2 walks into the 2nd, and that was it for Romero.  Nick turned it over to his righty long - Sergio Mitre, who was no better, allowing 4 more runs in by the end of the 2nd, culminated in a 2-RBI B.J.Upton triple.  Nick got 2 back in the 4th on a Jason Bartlett RBI-double, and a bases loaded walk issued to Jim Thome - 7 to 4, Torto.  My Tigers tacked on runs again in the bottom of the 4th (1), 6th (1), and 7th (2),  while Nick mustered only a solo HR by John Jaso the rest of the way.
Torto wins 11-5

Game 3 - Jake Peavy @ Joel Pineiro:
Pineiro, who was coming off his best outing of the year vs. Spence (8+ innings of 1 run ball), was dealing again in this one.  And Peavy, while sharp early had his outing cut short due to questionable defense.  The Tigers got on the board first, on a classic NL ball sequence - The O-Dog singled, then stole his way to 2nd, was sacrificed over to 3rd by Elvis, and then sac flied home by Boring Barton.  The 5th spelled disaster for Nick - after giving up singles to Zobrist and Pierre, Mike Napoli sailed his throw into center on the Pierre steal attempt of 2nd, scoring Zobrist.  Peavy then issued a 2-out walk to Mr. Boring, Joe Mauer sprayed a ball out to left, where Brennan Boesch attempted to track it down (filling in for the previously ejected Shin Soo-Choo, who argued balls & strikes).  The Big Puppy flubbed the play, for a 3-base error, making the lead now 4 to zip.  Mike Napoli attempted to atone for his error by getting Nick his lone RBI of the game, an RBI doubling home of Jason Bartlett.  The Tigers tacked on one more in the 6th (O-Dog RBI double), and the scoring ended for both teams there.
Torto wins 5-1

Torto wins series 3-0

Tough series for Nick, as his high powered offense was limited to just 3 home runs, and costly errors  and base hits allowed due to poor defensive ranges proved the difference in this one.  Ironically, Shin Soo-Choo's ejection cost him any further playing time on Nick's squad, as he was promptly traded to Mario's Blue Jays the next morning.

Put a cork in it Youklis! Spencer @ Torto from the Tort Fort

Another series update from the Tort Fort outing.  My Tigers at his BoSox - Spence took the series, but asked that I do the write up, as he still had to do his for his series vs. Mar and Nick.  I won't waste a lot of set up here, just dive right in.


Say it ain't so Youk - say it ain't so...

Game 1: Joel Pineiro @ Jeff Niemann: This game started off slow for both squads, but things got rolling for my Tigers and Joseph P. Mauer in the 4th and 5th (Mauer RBI double in 4th and Niemann walked Mauer with the bases juiced) in the 5th). Then they got worse for Spencer in the 6th, where Niemann completely lost his composure - giving up 4 runs, 2 on a HR to the Grandyman, and 2 more on a 2-out single from Elvis Andrus.  Spencer mustered 1 run in the 9th off of Pineiro (sac fly from Big Tex), who was then thwarted from the complete game, and yielded the remainder of the 9th to Frankie Francisco.
Torto wins 6-1
Note:  One interesting event of note, was the suspicious bat Kevin Youklis was using during the game.  The home plate umpire must have noticed a sound off the bat from his 7th inning double, and asked for the bat at the end of the game. It was thereafter found to have been corked.
***Kevin Youklis suspended for 10 games***

Game 2: Justin Vargas @ Cliff Lee
This battle of the lefty starters was not the run-fest some might have thought - rather it was a well-pitched duel of southpaws.  Spencer struck first with a solo shot from Adam 'Pacman' Jones in the bottom of the 2nd, and then got 2 more runs in the 3rd, on the strength of doubles from Yunelly "the Fly Felly" Escobar and Austin "Action" Jackson.  The Tigers clawed back in the 5th, with a 2-out, 2-RBI double from Daric "Boring" Barton.  But the scoring would end there, not without drama though.  In the top of the 9th, the Tigers got freshly called up Edwin Encarncion on base with a single, and Elvis Andrus pinch ran for him, stealing his way around to 3rd on the ignorance of Chris Perez.  Denard Span (an A-bunter) attempted to squeeze in the tying run, but tapped it right back to the pitcher for a LEAD OUT (DAMMIT).  Span then stole his way over to 2nd, and the wild Perez walked both Juan Pierre and Daric Barton, loading the bases for Paully "Player-Manager?" Konerko - who proceeded to hit an outfield range to Adam Jones, who made the sliding catch to end the game.  Defense Nick - are you paying attention?
Spencer wins 3-2

Game 3: King Felix @ Clay Bucholz: Another pitcher's duel for this one friends - Spencer got on the board first with an "A-bomb for A-Rod", then followed up with a sac fly from Derek Jeter (following an A-Jax triple).  The good guys struck back with back-to-back solo jacks from Boring Barton and Cap'n Paully in the 4th.  Spence took the lead back for good on another sac fly, this time from Nick Markakis in the bottom of the 4th.  No runs crossed the plate from thereon, although the Tigers had their chances with at least 1 baserunner (and usually 2) from the 4th on. King Felix did his job, Seattle-style, a complete game loss.
Spencer wins 3-2 (again, sigh)

Spence wins series 2-1.

Like Pitching? Read on.....Spencer @ Mario

Mario and I met up for the first time this AL season at the Tort Fort. Here's the details!!

GAME 1 Matt "Mexian Mafia" Garza @ Carl "Boring" Pavano

Game was a tight pitching duel through six innings as both pitchers had allowed on two baserunners each. Pavano started the Top of the 7th by giving up a Big Tex solo bomb. A B-Rob (Brian Roberts) double and RBI single from Adam "PacMan" Jones made it 2-0 Spencer.
A-Rod smacked a RBI double in the 8th to make it 3-0 Spencer. Spencer would add three more runs in the Top of the 9th on a bases clearing double by Action Jackson. SPENCER WINS 6-0
Real story here was Garza who scattered three baserunners and struckout seven.

W-Garza (CG, 3H, 7K)
L - Pavano (CG, 11H, 6ER, 1BB, 4K, 1HR)
HR - Big Bad Tex....Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


GAME 2 Dan "The Man" Har-en @ Brett "Mr." Anderson

This game was the exact same game as Game 1, except Spencer was the hard luck loser.
The only scoring in the game came from Mario in the bottom of 7. Vern Wells, Jose Lopez and Misty May-Treanor's husband all singled to load the bases with no outs. Alexi "Skeletor" "Alfonso Soriano Lite" Ramirez jimmy-jacked a Grand Slam over the CF fence. MARIO WINS 4-0
Again, real story of the game was Brett Anderson. Scattered six hits and walked only one.
Two games. Four pitchers. Four CGs.

W- Anderson CG, 6H, 1BB, 3K
L - Haren CG, 7H, 4ER, 6K, 1HR
HR - Skeletor Ramirez (GS)


GAME 3 Brett Cecil the Turtle @ Andy "Retired Living in Palm Springs" Pettitte

Bullpens were actually used in this game. Brett Cecil, by the way, was replacing the demoted to the bullpen Jeff Niemann.
Score was tied 1-1 after 9 innings. Spencer scored first on a Action Jackson RBI single. Mario countered with a Mags "Not Rey" Ordonez solo HR.
The 10th inning went by without any hiccups for either team. In the 11th, Yunelly the Fly Felly led off with his 4th hit of the game, a double. He scored on Action Jackson's second RBI. A 2-run A-BOMB FOR A-ROD sealed the deal. Joaquin "Chris" Benoit closed the door in the bottom of the 11th. Brett Cecil, went 8 IP, 1ER, 3H, 4BB. SPENCER WINS 4-1. SPENCER TAKES 2 of 3.

W-Matt Gurrier 2.0 IP, 0H, 0K, 0BB
L - Jeff Francis 1.2, 3R, 3H, 2K
S - Benoit IP, 2H, 2K

Aside from the Brewers getting spanked that night and plastic chair wild fire interuptions, it was a good, fun, fast, crisp series between Mario and I.

10-5 now, ya'll bitches!!!!!

Trades, trades, and more trades

This Friday night/Saturday evening at the Tort Fort bore witness to a number of series, played by Nick, Spencer, Mario, and myself (updates forthcoming).  More exciting than that, was the number of trades that went down.  Here's the recap:

Things got started Friday night, when Spencer and I exchanged a pair of centerfielders.
Spencer got - Curtis Granderson (CF)
Torto got - B.J.Upton (CF)


The trades continued in the morning, after a late night Mario/Torto deal had been shelved for the evening:
Mario got - Juan Pierre (LF), Gavin Floyd (SP), and Frank Francisco (RP)
Torto got - Maggs Ordonez (RF), Brett Anderson (SP), and Ryan Sweeny (CF)

Later that same morning, Mario got tradey again - this time with Nick, continuing to retool his entire roster:
Mario got - Shin Soo-Choo (RF), David Ortiz (1B/DH), and Zack Greinke (SP)
Nick got - Miguel Cabrera (1B), Jared Weaver (SP), and Luke "The Birther" Scott (1B/LF)


That's it for now, look for the series updates later on in the coming week, standings to be updated soon.  A quick summary from Friday night has:
Spencer going 6-3 (2-1 vs. Nick; 2-1 vs. Torto, 2-1 vs. Mario)
Torto going 4-2 (1-2 vs. Spencer, 3-0 vs. Nick)
Nick going 1-5 (1-2 vs. Spencer, 0-3 vs. Torto)
Mario going 1-2 (vs. Spencer)

Don Kelly. Laurent's long lost brother?

Not sure how I didn't see it sooner.  Perhaps chalk it up to his increased playing time in the playoffs with the injury to Magglio, and Leyland's need to platoon at 3B, but Don Kelly of the Detroit Tigers has gotten plenty of TBS and Fox camera closeups.  Jess immediately pointed it out to me - Don Kelly bears a striking resemblance to one Thomas King Laurent.

Exhibit A - Mr. Don Kelly, Detroit Tigers Utilityman Extrordonaire

Exhibit B - Tom Laurent (pay no attention to that handsome Tigers fan in the background)

Tom's long lost little brother (Kelly is 31 years old)? Kelly is also tall and lanky (6'4", 190)  Or am I just seeing things.  You be the judge.  

Mario gets a taste of 'Minnesota Nice', Manny dives onto the DL

Manny being Manny - bumbling around in left field and finding ways to sabotage my team

The last time Mar and I played PTP, it was in Reagan International Airport waiting for our flight back to Milwaukee.  We once again continued our road rolling ways, this time in Roseville, Minnesota over a Summit EPA and a plate of hot wings.  Irritated that both Spencer and Nick sat above me in the standings, it was time to give Mario a dose of 'Minnesota Nice'.

Game 1:  Felix Hernandez @ Andy Pettite
Newly acquired King Felix was finally ready for his first start as a Tiger, and he didn't disappoint - scattering 5 hits over the full 9 innings, and allowing only 2 runs.  Those 2 runs were not enough to earn Mar the win, as the Tiger offense was active early, using a Manny sac fly and a Adrien Beltre 2-run blast to put 3 up on the board in the top of the first.  Elvis Andrus scored new cog Ben Zobrist on a 2-out RBI single in the 2nd, a solo homer by Paully Konerko in the 6th, followed by a Paully RBI-single in the 8th, made it 6-2, and Mario had no offensive counter.
Torto wins 6-2

Game 2:  Doug Fister @ Jared Weaver
Mar felt better about this pitching matchup, as he had his #1 ace on the mound.  This feeling didn't last though, as my Tigers' bats exploded in the middle innings.  My squad got on the board in the 1st again,  this time on another Cap'n Paully RBI-single.  Konerko continued his hot hitting ways, with a 2-run HR in the 3rd.
During the bottom of the fifth, a bizzare roll (and likely a misadventurous route to the ball) had Manny diving for a sinking liner in left, that got by him for a double all score.  The roll for injury proved disastrous, costing the dreadlocked Dominican 30 games, essentially the entire season, unless I somehow find my way into games 6 or 7 in a World Series.
But back to the game, the top of the 6th rolled around, and Weaver got himself into trouble, giving up a 3-run HR to the Grandyman, then a series of doubles, walks, and singles that ended the inning with the score at 8-naught. Fister (I hardly knew her?) was absolutely lights out thru 7, and the pile-one runs kept coming with the Tigers scoring 1 in the 7th, 4 in the 8th, and another 5 in the 9th, the highlight being a Ben Zobrist GRAND SLAM.  Last man out of the bullpen, Franky Francisco, cruised thru the last two innings in Fister's stead, and the rout was mercifully over.
Torto wins 18-0 

Game 3:  Gavin Floyd @ C.C.Sebathia
Now desparate to salvage something out of this series, Mario called on his big bad #2, C.C. to stop the bleeding.  Unfortunately, my squad often enjoys battering around lefties, particularly those with poor hold/arm combos, and this game was no exception.  Mario was out to a 2-1 lead thru 6, but CC was gotten to in a bad way in the top of the 7th, touching him up for 5 with the bulk of the runs coming in on a bases loaded base-clearing double by Beltre.  To add to Mar's misery, the Rabbits were running wild, stealing 5 bases and generally drawing out the game to an annoying length.  Mario couldn't navigate thru my bullpen combo of Duensing, Crain, and Balfour in the 7th, 8th, and 9th, and again went down quietely.
Torto wins 6-2
Torto sweeps 3-0 

And since Manny can't follow the simple instructions we gave him when in the field (just let everything fall in front of you), and is injured for the duration of the regular season, the Tigers will be calling up one Edwin Encarnacion from the minors to fill out the roster.

APD anytime soon?

The subject of this post says it all. Do we have an APD on the horizon anytime soon?
I feel like out PTP playing has gone by the wayside (the waysides where gay sex happens, not the good waysides like on the way to the Dells).

We need to get some dates thrown out there, so some of us can ask off work.

Personally I have Sat Sept 24th open and October 1st (although there is the WISCO/NEBASKO game we may be drinking at that day.

Let's get our shit together and make this happen!

-Archie Cianfracco

NL Playoffs - Nick vs. Fish

Phillips Wisconsin




The much anticipated NL Playoff Series between Nick Ewoldt and Scott Fisher was played over Labor Day Weekend. Let me tell you about it:

Game 1: Oswalt vs. Latos

Nick was on the board early with Heisy reaching base on a fielder’s choice and was promptly scored on a Polanco triple. Polance would score on a David Wright double. That would be more than enough for Oswalt as he had it on lock going the distance, 9 innings, 5 hits, 1 walk, 13 strikeouts. Nick wins 3-1.
WP – Oswalt
LP – Latos

Game 2: Padilla vs. Cain

More offensive output here – it started in the top of the 4th with a lead off walk to C. Gonzalez, scored quickly on a two run home run by Prince Fielder. Fish scored in the bottom of 4th with a solo home run from the Hanigans. Nick would score again in the top of the 6th on a two run blast by Ethier. It was answered in the bottom of the frame with a two run home run by Joey Votto. Nick would score his Badger Mutual Insurance run in the top of the 7th on a Infante solo home run, Nick wins 5-4.

WP-Padilla
LP- Cain
Save – Gregerson

Game 3: Wood vs. Hanson

This was the most important and series changing game. Great pitching would dominate the outset. Fish took the lead in the top of the 5th when T Plush scored after a bases loaded walk. Nick would come back and take the lead in the bottom of the 8th on a two run double by off all people Alfonaso Soriano. In the top of the 9th, Nick brought on Gregerson to close out the game, however he allowed a lead off single to Tyler Colvin, then a bunt single by Nyjer Morgan. At this point, Fish substituted Matt Cain for the Hanigans to try a sacrifice bunt, it was bunted and Nick the option to try and throw out the lead runner or retire the batter at 1st – he choice poorly. Colvin slides in safe at third with the bases loaded and no outs. Votto, a Clutch Batter, rolled what would normally be a foul ball, but with Clutch batter and without the Jam on Gregerson’s card, it turned into a double, scoring two runners to take the lead. Marmol would come on in the 9th for the save. Fish wins 3-2.

WP- Wagner
LP – Gregerson
Save – Marmol

Game 4: Silva vs. Kennedy

Fish would score early in the game with two run double by Jose Reyes. Nick answered with a bases loaded Hit’s Batter in the bottom of the 2nd, but could not muster any additional runs in the frame. Fish broke the game open in the top of the 6th on back to back doubles by HOF players C. Jones and J. Edmonds, then followed by a single from Morgan and double by Hanigan. Fish wins 6 -2

WP – Loe
LP – Kennedy

Game 5: Latos vs. Oswalt

Fish had better luck against Oswalt this time around, with a top of the 2nd RBI double from Jose Reyes and a two run home run from Jim Edmonds. Nick would score one run against Latos, an RBI single from Ether. Marmol would come on to close it out in the 9th. Fish wins 3-1.

WP – Latos
LP – Oswalt
Save – Marmol

Game 6: Padilla vs. Cain

Fish struck quickly and hard in the bottom of the 3rd when Dan Uggla hit a three run home run. Nick answered in the top of the 6th when Prince Fielder hit a two run home run. Uggla responded in the bottom of the frame to hit a solo home run, which was enough to win the game and the series. Fish wins 5 – 3.

WP – Cain
LP – Padilla
Save – Marmol

Series MVP – Matt Cain for the bunt fielder’s choice in Game 3 and Win in Game 6. All kidding aside, the series was very close and all games were very well pitched. Hats off to Nick on the year and the great series!

Coolest Bobblehead Ever?

The Tiger's current AAA affiliate, the Toledo Mud Hens were first brought to national recognition by Toledo's own cross-dressing Corporal Klinger in the oft-funny, sometimes depressing drama-dy, M*A*S*H*.  Jamie Farr played this character, and was actually from Toledo in real life and often wore Mud Hens jerseys on the show.  So check out this (probably long overdue) sweet bobble - complete with matching skirt and the famous M*A*S*H* "this far to" sign.

Maybe you guys weren't fans of the show, but I was as my parents and grandparents watched it all the time.  I always thought Klinger was funny, especially when he busted out the full dress and makeup whenever the big brass showed up at the camp, just to try and get them to classify him as 'crazy' and send him back home to Toledo.  It never worked though.  Sort of an inadvertent "don't ask, don't tell" situation.

Anyways, I wish I could get one of these, but it will likely be quite a hot item, since they are only giving away 2,000.